Maybe you're super excited to try anal and you want to get right in there — don't. It's always best to start slowly with a new sexual experience, but is especially important when you're trying anal sex because the sphincter muscles in an anus are tightly closed. So, instead of jumping in with a penis or sex toy, have your partner stick one (lubed up!) finger inside your rectum first. Then, slowly add more fingers until you're ready to move on to penetration with a penis or with a strap-on.
He recommends starting off with a toy that’s made from an easy-to-clean material like silicone (which is nonporous and hypoallergenic), on the skinny side, and smooth with no rough edges or bumps. It should also have a flared base so that the toy doesn’t slip all the way in and get lost in your butt (which people actually go to the emergency room for all the time.)
These are swollen veins in your rectum or anus that can burn and itch. Straining when you poop or pressure during pregnancy can cause them. Sitting in warm water (a sitz bath) for 15 minutes several times a day may help. Try one after you poop. Drink plenty of water daily and get fiber in your diet so stools are softer. Call your doctor if you notice blood or have pain during a bowel movement so he can rule out more serious conditions.
"His being exceedingly well-endowed made taking it slowly and using plenty of lube the obvious choice. The oddest thing I noticed was that the initial penetration would generate a tight sensation in my throat, similar to what you might feel after a bad scare. But it was an exciting feeling, not scary at all. It's a slow but pleasantly luxurious sensation of being gently and benignly pulled inside out. It certainly was extremely erotic, and I felt aware of my entire body as an erogenous zone. I discovered I was able to orgasm via anal penetration, and anal play is something I enjoy to this day." —Mollena W.
Pain during receptive anal sex among gay men (or men who have sex with men) is formally known as anodyspareunia. In one study, 61% of gay or bisexual men said they experienced painful receptive anal sex and that it was the most frequent sexual difficulty they had experienced. By contrast, 24% of gay or bisexual men stated that they always experienced some degree of pain during anal sex, and about 12% of gay men find it too painful to pursue receptive anal sex; it was concluded that the perception of anal sex as painful is as likely to be psychologically or emotionally based as it is to be physically based. Factors predictive of pain during anal sex include inadequate lubrication, feeling tense or anxious, lack of stimulation, as well as lack of social ease with being gay and being closeted. Research has found that psychological factors can in fact be the primary contributors to the experience of pain during anal intercourse and that adequate communication between sexual partners can prevent it, countering the notion that pain is always inevitable during anal sex.
If done right, absolutely. While it’s true that anal is one of the riskiest types of sex, in terms of spreading sexually transmitted disease – including HIV – if you follow safe sex practices and do it with someone you trust and respect (even better, someone you love), it’s perfectly safe. Go slow, be gentle, listen to each other, use lots of lube, and wear a condom and you’ll be fine.
A small number of anal cancers are known as adenocarcinomas. These start in cells that line the upper part of the anus near the rectum. They can also start in the glands under the anal mucosa that release secretions into the anal canal. Most anal adenocarcinomas are treated the same as rectal carcinomas. For more information, see Colorectal Cancer.
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It's important that we talk about all kinds of sex because not everyone is having, or wants to have, "penis in the vagina" sex. If you do have "penis in the vagina" sex and are curious about something else, or are finding that that type of sex is not for you and you'd just like to explore other options, it's helpful to know the facts. Even if you do learn more and decide anal sex is not a thing you'd like to try, it doesn't hurt to have the information.
This seems to be the top reason as to why women say no to anal sex. "Let's face it. Guys that like being pegged enjoy it as it the dildo stimulates their prostate gland and that pleasure overrides most of the pain of entry," says Coleen Singer of Sssh.com, a porn site for women and couples. "Women don't have that benefit and unless totally relaxed and very well lubricated. Personally, if I haven't had anal sex for a while, I'll pop in a medium size butt plug for an hour or so before taking the penis as it relaxes the sphincter and makes penetration much more pleasant," says Singer.
2. Try out anal play first. Before embarking on the full monte of penetrative, anal sex, you can—and should!—give lighter anal play a try. This is open to interpretation, and could mean anything from toys to fingers or mouths. It'll give you a lower-pressure idea of what the ~sensations~ of anal stimulation feel like, and is a way of working up to the big show. Or not! If you decide some light anal play is all you're interested in, camp out there forever. No rules here, except to use lube, have consent, and USE LUBE.