What risk are you talking about? This is an example of why saying “all, always, every”, etc… can make you look stupid. Especially since one form of “safety measure” is abstinence… and if you follow that one I’m REALLY having trouble spotting the risk!!! Not trying to sound like an A$$, but it sounds like the biggest thing you are at risk of is a mundane sex life.

In addition to HIV, a person can get other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) like chlamydia and gonorrhea from anal sex without condoms. Even if a condom is used, some STDs can still be transmitted through skin-to-skin contact (like syphilis or herpes). One can also get hepatitis A, B, and C; parasites like Giardia and intestinal amoebas; and bacteria like Shigella, Salmonella, Campylobacter, and E. coli from anal sex without a condom because they’re transmitted through feces. Getting tested and treated for STDs reduces a person’s chances of getting or transmitting HIV through anal sex. If one has never had hepatitis A or B, there are vaccines to prevent them. A health care provider can make recommendations about vaccines.


I really want to enjoy anal sex with my husband, but can’t seem to get over that feeling of needing to go to the bathroom. I’m terrified something may come out while we do it. What’s the best way to get past that “gotta poo” feeling? We want to work up to double penetration, but that’s not going to be possible until I can work through this. BTW – I’m absolutely loving your content. Very helpful!
6. Pay attention the butt cheeks too! Just because your ultimate goal is the butthole, doesn’t mean you should totally ghost your partner’s butt cheeks. Sadie Allison, founder of TickleKitty.com and author of Tickle My Tush–Mild-to-Wild Analplay Adventures for Every Booty, recommends starting off with a sensual booty massage. Using lube, “place your thumbs in the creases where the legs meet the butt cheeks and glide your thumbs along the crease from the inner thigh area to the outer side. Lift and repeat. Then, put your palms together in "prayer position," placing them on their tailbone and gliding up and down their buttcrack."
A male citizen taking the passive (or receptive) role in anal intercourse (paedicatio in Latin) was condemned in Rome as an act of impudicitia (immodesty or unchastity); free men, however, frequently took the active role with a young male slave, known as a catamite or puer delicatus. The latter was allowed because anal intercourse was considered equivalent to vaginal intercourse in this way; men were said to "take it like a woman" (muliebria pati, "to undergo womanly things") when they were anally penetrated, but when a man performed anal sex on a woman, she was thought of as playing the boy's role.[115] Likewise, women were believed to only be capable of anal sex or other sex acts with women if they possessed an exceptionally large clitoris or a dildo.[115] The passive partner in any of these cases was always considered a woman or a boy because being the one who penetrates was characterized as the only appropriate way for an adult male citizen to engage in sexual activity, and he was therefore considered unmanly if he was the one who was penetrated; slaves could be considered "non-citizen".[115] Although Roman men often availed themselves of their own slaves or others for anal intercourse, Roman comedies and plays presented Greek settings and characters for explicit acts of anal intercourse, and this may be indicative that the Romans thought of anal sex as something specifically "Greek".[116]

So when you have vaginal sex, and the man cums then (most of the time) pulls out. What happens then? (not sure how graphic I can be here…) Some of the semen comes back out and gets on the sheets, your panties, down your leg… you get the picture. Ever noticed that if stay still on your back or it comes out pretty quickly, that it runs down you to the bed… passing near / over / maybe even slightly in the anus.


6. Throw other stimulation into the mix. Listen, they don't make those wild-looking, three-pronged sex toys for nothing. Once you're in the groove of things, add in some clit stimulation, some vaginal stimulation, or heck, all three. Some women say this combo feels overstimulating in the best way. In any case, most women need some combination of stimulation to orgasm—whether that's clit/vaginal, or anal/clit+vaginal is totally subjective. But isn't it fun to learn new things about your own orgasms?
Now that you know how to have anal sex with your man that is both satisfying and fun, my suggestion is that you read the next chapter in the Anal Sex Guide on how to prepare for anal sex. After that, make sure to check out the best anal sex positions and then learn how to eat ass (it can be very pleasurable and super kinky). And if your man is keen on anal play, then make sure you learn how to give him a prostate massage.
The anal sphincter acts as a bit of a gatekeeper for the rectum. For anal sex, however, it’s important that this muscle relaxes. Not only does it make the experience more pleasurable, it reduces the risk of tearing or discomfort. Relaxation involves patience, both at the time you’re attempting penetration, and as you become more accustomed to anal sex.
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