Start With A Lubed Finger – If you read the Anal Sex Preparation Guide here, you’ll know that it’s best to try penetrating yourself ALONE first with a finger covered in lube so that you get to see how your sphincter reacts to it. If you’ve already done this a few times and have a good idea of how long it takes to relax around your finger, then you can get your man to do the honors this time. If you haven’t done it by yourself yet, then I recommend that you try it alone first while following these instructions.
When there’s a bunch of waste in your colon that needs to come out, your colon contracts and pushes the stool into the rectum, an 8-inch chamber that connects the colon to the anus. Your brain receives the signal that you need to head to the bathroom sometime soon, and your rectum stores the stool until you voluntarily contract it to push the poop out.
The anal sphincter acts as a bit of a gatekeeper for the rectum. For anal sex, however, it’s important that this muscle relaxes. Not only does it make the experience more pleasurable, it reduces the risk of tearing or discomfort. Relaxation involves patience, both at the time you’re attempting penetration, and as you become more accustomed to anal sex.